Clashing Spirits at Christmas

CLASHING SPIRITS

AT CHRISTMAS

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In the cafeteria, that Thursday before Christmas break, a fellow teacher, Leonard Koening, silently bowed his head before he ate.  Though annoyed, as we ate, I tolerantly engaged him in conversation.  You see, I hated Christians.  To my surprise, we chatted about a dominating immoral passion we both experienced.

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Relatively new to the area and hoping he would link me up with some local likeminded women, I asked for some contact information.  He astonished me responding, “I don’t do that anymore.  I’ve broken all contact with them.”  That excuse made no sense to me.  Could he be serious?  Then I remembered he prayed.

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At that moment, I was secretly suffering the disappointments, frustrations, and inner turmoil my godless lifestyle had accumulated.  His refusal only added to my emotional conflicts, and it really set me off.  When we got outside, my hostility exploded.  I was suddenly up in his space, nearly scrubbing his face with my scruffy beard, “I saw you pray…you’re a Christian or something!”  He affirmed my allegation, mildly nodding, “Yes…I believe in Jesus.”

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“You Christian you, why don’t you just convert me?…you Christian you.”  Challenging him further, I ranted, “Why don’t you save me, if you’re such a faithful believer?”

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He calmly responded, “John, I can’t do that…but what I can do is tell you what happened to me.”  I actually stunned myself when I accepted his offer.  So, he told me his story.

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I acted unimpressed, but Leonard was not talking about some foolish theological concept or dicey spiritual mind game.  Instead, he told me of a God with whom, he honestly believed he had a relationship, Who he also said actually loved even people like me, despite my contempt for Him and His ethicals.  Rather than rigorous of “holy demands,” Leonard spoke of the peace he had, now that God’s Spirit lived within him.  He simply didn’t want he wanted before.

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Leary of undisclosed strings attached, I hid my longing for even a year of peace, I asked, “So, what does this god of yours want from me?”

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Leonard answer, “John, think about it.  He is God…He doesn’t want anything you have.  He wants to give you what He has.”

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“That is ridiculous,” I said, “Why would God take on human form and die for me?  Seriously, what is in it for Him?”

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“John, God loves you.  He just wants you to love Him back.  Think about,” Leonard reasoned, “What kind of God of love would He be, if those He loves didn’t love Him in return?”    

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Later, alone in my apartment, I couldn’t help wondering if Jesus really might have been God, coming in human form, then allow Himself to be killed, in order to provide peace between Himself and me.  Could God have done all that, to make it perfectly clear that He loves “me?” 

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I considered, “Why not turn to that Divine Person, Who claims to love me so completely and unconditionally?”

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Kneeling on my apartment floor, I tried to talk to the “God,” Leonard described.  I started, “God, if You are real?”  Then I remembered Leonard quoting a Bible verse that says, “Those who come to Me, must believe that I am, and that I am a rewarder of those who diligently seek Me.”

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 So, I changed my prayer, saying, “God, I believe you are there, and that Jesus Christ is Your Son.”  My indication faith in Him and His Son was accepted, because God took over from there.  I was startled with the reality that my sin lead to the vicious murder of Jesus, on a Roman cross.  Forgiven, I was not alone, frustrated, or struggling with inner turmoil.  Instead, His joy and peace filled my empty hearth…and yes, yes, yes, I love Him! 

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His love, peace, and joy were mine, and that Christmas was the very best Christmas of my life.  Amazingly, each year thereafter has been a celebration of Christ’s life and love within.  This Christmas, I pray His love, peace, and joy will fill your life as well.  God loves us.  Leonard lived one more year, before he died.  God’s gift of love came to me through that dear man, and I will be eternally grateful that God allowed him to live long enough that 46 years ago our paths crossed.  That is Love.

John 3:16   For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life.  17 For God did not send his Son into the world to condemn the world, but to save the world through him.